"Honey, what's this on the fridge?"
"Oh, that? That's my sitter list. Joyce is taking her family to Massachusetts this week, so I'm sitting her house."
"Okay, but that's not what this thing says. It's a whole list. Petsitter, Plantsitter, Mailsitter, Newspapersitter, Toiletsitter, Bedsitter, LivingroomrugSitter... this list has got to be like... Jesus, Honey, how many pages is this?"
"Housesitting is just the summary. You're looking at the condensed list. She went through and systematically categorized every object in her house, and then added the word 'sitter' to the end."
"Well, alright. So, what, she comes back Friday?"
"That's it?"
"What do you mean?"
"She creates a lengthy and psychotic list, and all you want to know is when she comes back? What does it take to surprise you?"
"Threedayoldfrostbittenleftoverssitter?"
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